It’s #WIPpet Wednesday !
Today is December 4, 2013.
- I added the month and the date: 12+4=16 paragraphs, post-NaNo edited.
Spock and an enigmatic woman from a troubled time in his past struggle to save two worlds from alien threats, neither knowing whether their renewed connection will bring salvation or devastation.
We find Spock, kneeling upon the sands of Gol, cast away by the Kolinahru he hoped to join. This scene occurs before Amanda’s snippet, Prodigal Son.
This WIP is set in the time frame of Star Trek: The Motion Picture. Within the Trueborn double series, this WIP occurs before Spock discovers whether T’Lys is real, or a childhood delusion carried into adulthood. It’s the companion volume to Sima Garo Provides (Trueborn Weft Series), original fantasy.
I held the symbol of Kolinahr, cast upon the sands as I had thought my emotions to be. I caressed it, craving touch, craving T’Lys, craving the solace of the entity’s pure, layered, logic. Craving, too, the promise of nothingness Gol had offered – and which I had, in a single motion, rejected.
I had not known that I would lift my hand, and deny myself the peace, the prison, of Kolinahr, until I felt it lifting. I’d spent the threeday between alone upon the Forge, meditating, sobbing when I could not resist, but not allowing myself the pleasures of self-gratification – something within me was far too open, too yearning. I feared that, if I gave myself to those primal impulses, even once, I would not be able to stop short of giving myself over in another lifebond with T’Lys….
And still, I did not know if she was real, and had no way to ascertain it, unless I could find her…
I considered that course of action, considered leaving Gol and procuring a shuttle (how I would accomplish this, I knew not; I had released all my resources and holdings to others before joining the retreat here), and simply traveling in the direction that led to her….until I found her, ran out of fuel, or died. I was not certain that I cared which…
When I found myself running toward ShiKahr and its spaceport at midday, I knew that I had not attained Kolinahr, that I had only been hiding my emotions, even from myself. There was no logic in that, either…
I went back to the desert just beyond Gol, where I would not be seen, and turned to the entity again, away from T’Lys and the enticing chaos she had so often brought me.
But, “Sima garo provides,” she whispered, as I left her. Even in this, she inflamed my imagination, kept a part of me to herself, would not release me.
Then, as now. I was still unsure whether I had lifted my hand, or if she had – but the result was the same. I had made the staying gesture, and that invited the touch of the Master’s mind. Had I been seeking that out, all along – another mind to touch, to connect myself to? After so much separation, and isolation, could it truly be so simple as that I needed that connection, to something or someone? To anything or anyone, indiscriminately?
When she had touched my mind – it shamed me to remember, but there was no logic in that, nor in attempting to forget what was etched within memory; etched in flame – when she touched my mind, I responded first as a male, surging toward what was female within her, my telerotic centers, so open and filled with T’Lys, seeking hers, offering, pleading for her to see me only as a male – a male who wanted her, wanted to touch, to pleasure, to claim, to dance, to find the bliss of Attunement.
For a moment, she responded, and there was shock in it for both of us….we almost gave in to it, to the searing, surging power of it…
“No, Spock. I am not what you need.” Still, despite her words, she did not withdraw, instead offering soothing touches to the inflamed parts of my mind and my soul.
“In this breath, you are All.” But it was untrue, even now, and I knew it, knew that she knew it even before she spoke again.
“And what of the next? No. She is writ large in your soul; thee cannot escape such connection, such passion. Perhaps, it was madness to try.” She urged me to the place where T’Lys, cloaked in flames and truth, waited, Huntress-still.
The Master spoke aloud now, her words for the attendants, but all was gibberish. She eased away from my mind, gently, but firmly, leaving the heat of desire to scorch only me, alone…
The Kolinahru turned, and left me. There was neither unkindness nor kindness in it; I had failed, and this was no longer my place. It remained unsaid, but I knew – I would not be welcomed here again.
I dropped the symbol of the newly accepted Kolinahru adept, and rose from my knees. I began to walk, to the only place that I still knew would accept me – because there was no one there to refuse me. It was a two day’s walk…perhaps, time to find myself amongst the flood of feelings, but, certainly, a refuge where I could hide myself.
I felt it. I knew that this was only the harbinger. Emotion was a tightly knotted tangle within me, a heaviness, but I could feel it loosening, swelling toward eruption, and I no longer thought I had any control over it.
There we have it – a man on the verge of crisis. Will he find a direction, or connection? Will he survive his explosive emotions? What will he choose?
For December, pick the WIP, and POV character! If you have a favorite, don’t be shy! Someone decides, and it could be you! This WIP is the default.
This seems to catch the mood of Spock’s conflict….
Want more WIPpets? Click the cute little blue froggy to read and/or join in yourself!
- WIPpet Wednesday: Recommissioned Officer (shanjeniahstruebornjottings.wordpress.com)
- WIPpet Wednesday: Hollow Awakening (shanjeniahstruebornjottings.wordpress.com)
- WIPpet Wednesday: Prodigal Son (shanjeniahstruebornjottings.wordpress.com)
- WIPpet Wednesday: There’s a Thing Out There! (shanjeniahstruebornjottings.wordpress.com)
- WIPpet Wednesday: Proxy Possibility (shanjeniahstruebornjottings.wordpress.com)
- WIPpet Wednesday: Tisira, Named (shanjeniahstruebornjottings.wordpress.com)
- WIPpet Wednesday: Defining Moment (gweberblog.wordpress.com)
- Weaving Prose and Deeper Peace; NaNoROW Update, 11/6/13 (shanjeniah.com)
- WIPpet Wednesday: Copier Cat (lovewhineandcheese.wordpress.com)